Today’s News — 4/29/2019


Today’s Hot Headlines

Hot Air: Wall Street Democrats Are Absolutely Freaking Out About Their 2020 Candidates

Oops: Easter Leftovers—Ham Tetrazzini Recipe

New York Sun: Conrad Black—They’re All Going to Hell

Today’s News Staff: Important Editorial Announcement

Humans Are Free: All AGW lies Debunked

Sarasota Magazine: Local Kennel Club Will Host Last Greyhound Races May 4

Cartoons Anonymous: 25 Sexiest Cartoon Women of All Time

Jerry Bruckenheimer: Lucifer is a Nightclub Owner

InstaPunk Returns: The Old Man’s Obviously Past It Now

Poughkeepsie Journal: Has Woodstock 50 Been Cancelled?

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Ed. Note: if you are a new or occasional visitor, give us a break. We’re usually better than this. See?




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My World and Welcome to It

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     This post was last updated at 5:30 A.M., Monday, August 11. Latest entries are “A New Breed of Chosen People?” and “An Old Forgotten Story Back in the News.” The Instapunk Times is hot off the presses... Undernet Black was updated August 11. This will be a pinned post in perpetuity, but it will be updated continuously, just like all of our lives. The title — “My World and Welcome to It” — is stolen happily from James Thurber, who is known as a humorist, unabashedly untrained cartoonist, and dog lover. He was also subject to melancholy, a drinker of note, and something of an outsider (in his own damaged eyes at least) as an Ohioan, born and educated, who became a fixture in the glamorous Algonquin Roundtable of Manhattan writers and playwrights. I can relate to all of that but the fame and the lifelong journey to blindness. I believe he was likely the best writer of the gang that gathered in the Algonquin Hotel in the 1930s, and I made my own pilgrimage there once in ...
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An Old Forgotten Story Back in the News

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  Here’s the “official” story as it has stood for a quarter century. This will be an unusual post. It contains my longest ever direct quote of another source, which happens to be the longest ever post I have seen at the Gateway Pundit website. Ordinarily this is a kind of topic I would have handled fairly briefly at Facebook, but the relevant text by Gateway and by me is too substantial for that. I tried doing it that way before choosing this site instead. Here’s the graphic I prepared for the FB post: After I’d  prepared the graphic, things started to get complicated. There was just too much relevant content for a Facebook post. I have a personal connection to the Oklahoma City bombing story you probably have to be 50 to share. I remember exactly where I was when it broke into the regular cable programming one April morning in 1995 with a Special Announcement of an unfolding catastrophe in the state where my sister lived. My TV, large screen for the time and equipped with sur...
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GoFundPence 2.0

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  Make America Moral Again (Rockies caps are available super-cheap about now..) Epstein is the trigger. Mike Pence is the man to pull it. Time is of the essence here. Opportunities like this must be seized quickly or they go away just as quickly. The good news is I did some work on this back in the ‘24 Campaign, but there just wasn’t enough time to pull things together. Now I’m prepared to pass on the concepts and deliverables I developed before, spiff them up a bit for the new situation, and let all the brave new reformers use them to change the tide for the better. Yes, I’m talking about giving all you sudden moral stickler MAGA dropouts a head start on the ‘28 Campaign, which, believe me, the pollsters are already making serious money on. Still don’t get it? I’m giving you the basics for Mike Pence for President 2.0. I had already collected materials and some copy notes for a Kindle book called, simply enough, Pence for President. Here’s the cover I designed at the time. The co...
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The Best Movie of the 21st Century?

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The IMDb List A month or so ago I heard an episode of the Cluck and Buck Radio Show (i.e., Clay Travis/Buck Sexton) discussing the lists of best 21st Century movies that have been popping up now that we’ve got a quarter of the new century under our belts. They weren’t happy with the names they were hearing. After a lot of what passes for manly banter between them they settled on The Dark Knight Rises as their pick for Number 1. It’s a better choice, I agree, than most of the titles on the list above, but the whole process of selection here seems sad. Even pitiful. I’ve seen exactly eight of the 21 movies shown here, and the only one I’d consider a candidate for the top spot is Lord of the Rings . I liked Lost in Translation’ s   inclusion   on the list as well. That’s about it. Most of it seems like pretentious junk, overhyped sequels, and predictably dark excursions into some director’s disappointments with the universe. Not what I watch movies for.  I very much do...
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I’m changing my Spirit Animal

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  In recent years, I’ve been making it a practice to snap a photo of myself on my birthday as I ascend into the heady realm of old age. I turned 72 on July 10, which is supposed to be the new 40 or something if you’re up to date on the newest dietary supplements and anti-prostapocalypse Kegel exercises that keep you youngalike for decades longer than your dad. 70 is not the new 40 though. By coincidence, if there is such a thing, a young lady I’ve regarded as a daughter since I met her sent me a photo she found just last week. I was 44 then. The Boomer Bible was 7 years behind me. She wasn’t trying to be unkind, just reminding me how long we’ve known each other. The years take their toll now, just as they always have. I don’t deny playing with the photos after I take them. My motives aren’t even pure. I’m trying to stage-manage the future, at least in part, because when they show us portraits of a long dead writer they tend to want us to see what they looked like toward the end, wh...
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A quick flash of Klieg lights from the subconscious

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  Saw a short but evocative post from Michael Smith on Facebook yesterday that struck an immediate chord with me:   It struck chords with a lot of people in fact. We’d already been through this once with all the guiltiest talking heads in the media interviewing all the accomplices in the political class about how the fact of Joe Biden’s serious dementia could have been covered up so thoroughly. Nauseating to watch. Now we have a similar but not quite identical phenomenon of the complicit talking heads in the huge set of hoaxes designed to destroy the Trump presidency inviting some of of the prime perpetrators on to deny the truth of Tulsi Gabbard’s charges with a straight face. Nodding all around as more lies are piled on top of the mountain of old lies. Does no one realize they are, if possible, making matters worse for themselves when the investigators bring their charges? Reading Smith’s post and the comments appended to it made me think of a movie I had seen as a kid. It w...
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REPOST: Take a Look at Who’s Behind the Destruction of America

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My Ghost Prevention Plan

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  The Valley of the Jerseyikes When you’ve decided to your own satisfaction that life doesn’t end with physical death, what have you got to worry about? That probably depends on where you come down on the age-old questions about ghosts. Do they exist? Are they a possible fate of troubled souls after they’ve shuffled off this mortal coil or been yanked out of it too suddenly? What if you expire peacefully and find yourself waking up in the attic of your own house, somehow tethered to it with no watch you can trust to keep track of time? I know I’ve stopped wearing a watch at all, like almost all of you out there. Are we taking some kind of risk that we’ll miss the departure signal for the trip to the other side? One side effect of getting old and not liking most of what’s on teevee is that you wind up watching too many paranormal shows, which have the virtue of no politics, no gratuitous sex scenes, and extended stretches of restful watching with almost nothing happening on screen. ...
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