Dutch Uncle Time



Guess I have to suspend the lackadaisical tone around here for a shoutout to the old FB pals, the Knew-It-All ORCs, the paranoid Trumpsters, and the lip-smacking cynics among you. You’re scaring the horses, meaning the ones who follow the lead of the direst voices and deepest, darkest signposts of disaster.

False alarms all round. All the polls about who’s a socialist and WTF socialism is anyway are not a story. Nobody knows how to write such a poll, conduct it scientifically, or evaluate the results honestly. All the jibber jabber about the Cohen dude is a total meaningless waste of time. People living their lives at least partway off the internet do not give a rat’s ass about a crooked lawyer testifying under oath (HaHaHa) to crooked politicians of every sex and dirty desire in the land. The Prez breaking off talks with the NoKo’s is not a problem of any kind. It’s a step, a very obvious and long overdue step, of teaching a belligerent, greedy, undisciplined child the meaning of the word “No.”

And no, the new loud crazy pre-menstrual and post-menopausal psychotics of the Democratic Caucae in the Congress are not winning. Anything. Anything but yawns, jokes, jeers, and juicy-juice boxes of various kinds sprayed at their faces on TV screens. That’s it. The men are watching basketball, heaven only knows why, while the women are doing what they do, eating, talking about what’s wrong with everybody else, and complaining about their men watching basketball, which won’t help. The Millennials, Neo-Know-It-All Libertarians, and National Review Depressives are all smoking weed out there on the deck, with every kind of scotch chaser ranging from bottom shelf to upper crust.

Meanwhile NOTHING SERIOUS OR FATAL OR IRRETRIEVABLE OR (dare we say it?) IRREDEEMABLE IS GOING ON. It’s just another day in the land of the scot-free and the home of the drunken brave. Yes, bad guys are still sneaking over the border. We’d say get used to it, but everybody who isn’t well and truly used to it by now is just lying and, yes, drunk. Believe it or not, they do already know the writing is on the Wall.

Put away your keyboards, kiss the wives and children and whoever else matters to you, and leave them kids alone.

Got it?

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