Da View

 

I’m old enough to remember this show, and even when I was eight  (sitting next to my Ohio grandma) I can remember asking myself, “Who watches this show?’ 

The answer was obvious. Women watch this show. I didn’t know about women then. Now, 60 years later, I still don’t know about women, but that’s beside the point. What’s on point is that when I was eight, I had my first experience of women going on TV and making me cringe in embarrassment for them.

The premise of the show was hard-luck women needing cash. They spilled, spilled all their sorry life minutiae in hope of being Queen for a Day, which meant that the winner won a cheesy tiara and a washer-dryer. Not kidding. Look for yourself…


An actual episode? Here you go.


Aren’t they silly, those women? Respectable housewives who keep their legs religiously together whoring themselves on national teevee for a Sears appliance.

Couldn’t happen today, right? But it is happening today. Every day. It’s called “The View.”  And women all over the country are watching it, drinking it in, believing the load of horseshit they get every day from women who are just slightly less ignorant and retarded, er, ‘mentally challenged’ than they are.

Whoopi? Joy? And who’s the hilarious one who’s trying to pass with her Clairol blonde and white-gel makeup except for when she needs to ‘get down’ with Whoopi as a tired old black woman still grieving for Emmett Till. Whom neither of them would recognize if he showed up in their lavish dressing rooms.

Emmett Till.

Do you whitebread American women who love Whoopi and Joy and Sunny know that they’re all millionaires? They’re the bloated dairy cows grazing on your gullibility. (Sorry, my pronoun-correction-app hasn’t kicked in yet). 

Oh. I forgot. It’s this cow. Who wants to be white in the worst way, except when Whoopi yanks the chain on her collar.



You know, I do pretty much despair of women, on the days when I’m not despairing of men, because I really do despise you all.

What I hate most, though, is the cheap fuck. So far, women as a group seem to be cheaper fucks than men.








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