I am the last one

 

Why I know how to survive the coming Dark Age. I’ve lived through it all, a century’s worth, from World War I to WWII to the Lost Generation of writers to Bunny Berigan and Benny Goodman and Ella Fitzgerald to Frank Sinatra and then the Beatles and Stones and AC/DC.

World War I because I put on my grandpa’s gas mask from his trunk. WWII because I looked inside my father’s P-47 1,600 hp cockpit and had nothing to compare it to but a tiny 1927 1200 lb 97 hp Bugatti aluminum interior I had personally driven at 97 mph with full knowledge of human mortality.

Before and after I had no fear. A hard thing to explain. I almost sank at sea when I was 10 and I was the only one who went to the Promenade Deck to stare into the abyss. I had a (probably sociopathic) friend with whom I encountered every possible automotive and marine challenge. I went all the way into the weeds and waves on every trial. Then I became a consultant running the international routes (hundreds). Never thought about it. Flew on the GM air force across the Midwest, DC-9s to Detroit and beyond and back. I do think about it now. Been there, done that. I’ve been through every risky flight and landing scenario I’ve seen on the Smithsonian Air Disasters Channel. I’m the only guy I know who’s done the escape chute off the plane. On my first honeymoon. Bad omen. I’ve landed at the end. No fear. 

Come get me. Feds are fake lawyers. I eat real lawyers for lunch. Come get me. I am the last one you want to interrogate.